Bukan rasis, tapi inilah.

Recently, aku ada tolong orang jual cupcakes.
So, like it or hate it, aku p annoy tiap2 penghuni2 bilik2 tersebut.
Good and bad, aku dapat both responses.
What really counts, cakes sold out.
Peluh, mengah n air liur aku duk promo dari bilik ke bilik pays off.

Apa yang aku nak story is about the response yg aku dpt dari random chinese girls.
Dorg yg bukan classmate, bukan jiran, bukan sapa2, but satu kampus dgn aku.
Most of them bukak pintu, seems surprised n blurred.
Not lucky enough, ada yang straight away cakap "Tak apa2"
Aku bukak mulut pun xlagi. Korang buat aku mcm criminal yg tipu org lam scam gores dan menang tu pulak.
Bila aku explain "I am selling cupcakes. Interested?"
They were like "Uh?"
Aku pun tayang laa cupcakes tue.
And dorang pandang like dorang super jijik.
Wei makanan tue. Comel lagi. Problem?

Chinese in nature memang susah nak mesra unless bila ada chance korang nak kenal satu sama lain.
Kalo korg pndai akademik, sgt cun, leh belajar sama2.
But it is naturally, kao yg kena tanya dorang DULU.
If u no ask, they will no show you. ---> Benda ne my chinese friend sendiri yg bgtau direct kat aku, mang cara dorang. Seemed selfish. Tapi lao ko nak ilmu, ko lah p cari kan?
Kalao lagi pandai dari dorang, lagi peh3, dorang akan adore kao, so u got a plus point.

Tapi lao chinese yg biasanya xda kaitan...
Memang susah nak bermesra..silap2 dorg leh p tarik muka depan kao..
But not all, xleh generalize, ramai je gak yg ok2.. (:

However, my chinese fren penah story kat aku
Dorang somtimes do look down on melayu or other races.
Egocentrism la ne...(thinking they r better than others)
Ye la..balik2.straight As muka dorang...yg dominate business dorg lagi..
Mana x rasa superior kan?
And kao xpayah la nak speak english sgt dgn dorang
my frens said...if they dunno you
they wud rather speaks in malay to you
even how english you speak to them.
this is bcuz of
 two reasons:
1. dia x pandai omputeh
2. dia ingat kao x pandai omputeh
And ada juga yang kata..
Dorg chinese geli tengok malays n indians makan pakai tangan...
macam2...hahahaha

But let's be honest,
aku pun dulu masa kecik2
aku geli tengok kulit india yg hitam2 berkilat
walaupun aku pun sama hitam jugak...hahaha
aku rasa kotor n jijik
BUT
come to think of it,
sekarang ne, aku siap leh tampar2 kulit begitu, belai2
share air n makanan dengan mereka
tanpa ada rasa geli
dgn member2 indians aku
Its just stigma
Perasan yg ko buat2 sebab ko x kenal

In fact, personally aku rasa indians jauh lebih bersih
most indians yg aku jumpa n perati
dorang amat rajin bersihkan bilik
mop lantai hari2 beb..hari2...
kalao aku...seminggu sekali pun da kira seribu rahmat dah...kah3...
bilik mmg deko tahap warna warni la...ceria..
soothing je masuk bilik dorang..
tue la kao..xtau..nak geli2 pulak...
haish...
let's change n give each other chances (:

Once you asked, But once given, U never care.

Maulud jatuh hari ini.
Day in which the muslim reminisce n flash back all the prophet's sacrifices.
Sama dengan tarikh kelahirannya.
Hari ni juga public hols.
Aku xbuat apa2 melainkan tido lambat n bangun lambat.
The least I'm doing is berpuasa n berselawat sikit2 (we're doing this everyday anyway).
Sungguh tiada penghayatan yg intense.

Sedikit kesal di hati, kononnya bertanya2
Kenapa pihak institut aku x wat program?
Xde perarakan? Maybe bukan hari ini programmnya kot.
Cuz last year, it was held on the other day.
Tapi ada ceramah di sebelah malam.
Xpulak aku nak rasa nak pergi.
Bila xada program, sibuk nak soal2...
Bila da ada dibuat, xpulak sibuk nak join kan?

Sebenarnya, maybe kita sedia maklum, hari ni spesel,
Tapi lau xada apa2, like macam tiada pulak orang yang ambil pusing.
So, pada aku macam mana sekalipun , mesti kena ada something.
Aku ne cakap je pandai, cuba suruh aku yg organize program,
0.01% success pun belum tentu lagi.

Ceramah is somthing yg sgt2 bagus. Even kita digalak pergi majlis ilmu. Stated clearly in hadith.
In my case, aku yg negative n need some help.
Ceramah, talks, sume2 ne doesnt work on me.
Xaku sembang dgn member sebelah, layan phone or layan kantuk lam masjid.
Adala sikit2 yg aku dengar. Ingat? adala berapa percent.
Xde inisiatif nak catat kan.
An advice says,
   
  "Do not look at the presenters, but look at what they are going to present. 
   The "what" might be something very valuable."

Untuk perkara mcm ne, I know its me who need to change.
Attitude cam harom.
Cuba kalau aku yg bagi ceramah n buat camne aku.
Orang buat bodo. No respect.
I would feel the pang on my face, my heart.
Surely.

Perkara ne sama je mcm fiil manusia2 kat Malaysia ne...
Ramai yg suka pertikai, bring up issue
Kenapa x buat dasar ini, program itu,
Tapi bila betul2 dibuat
Berapa kerat je yang betul2 turun padang n join the program.
Kecoh je lebih.
Time nak leceh2 x mau.
Taula nak berarak tue kena berpeluh2...duduk ramai,
Kena buat banner, prepare itu ini

Maybe orang kita suka pegang pada prinsip
"Asal Ada,". Kot.
Tapi bila ada, xde pun nak buat sungguh2.
Or biarla orang lain yg buat.

Stigma-tized.

Stigma is a feeling of disapproval for something or someone.
Yu oredi have this negative perception towards that particular one until whatever they do, you don't even have a single liking, even if they do you good.
Xmunasabah sunggoh kan. ish2. But it happens (:

At my study place, ada kes2 kami di-stagmatized.
Mungkin itulah, mereka x cukup kenal kami, sampai ada unsur2 x ummph camne.
Ada label yg kata batch aku ne problematic, maybe sebab ramai.
Ada yang kata kami cocky sebab amik course BI, yang kononnya up sikit dari course lain.
Oh kemon, kita sama saja...
Aku pun xpaham why certain men went wow bila aku cakap..oh Im doing English..
Wow.dia budak TESL...
The ugly fact is that kami sume ne masih belajar kot,
Cakap kompem la uh-ah-uh-ah, tue belum bab grammar, kejap past, kejap present, suka hati kitorg ah asal ada bunyi org puteh tue bolehla pass...ahaha
Agaknya camne la budak medik rasa bila aku wow-kan dorang...
Habis tue mcm mana pada profesion yg bukan doc? Pakcik alam flora pun deserve a wow ok..
We people just dunno how to value ourselves that we only see other's people specialities.
We adore them until we sometimes forget where we stand.

Oh ya, going thru this whole stigma stuff, my class r having tough time.
Aku boleh cakap tough bila ada air mata yg dah mengalir. Boleh tahan crybabies gak semuanya. haha!
Our challenge is to confront with demanding lecturer.
Perfection is xpectation.
Always agreeing is mandatory.
Tho the thing is not always right. How irrational.

Aku punya pengalaman. Aku present kat depan.
Isu yg kami diskus...is something...n time setting dia is BEFORE zaman penjajahan.
And clasmet aku ne maybe dia x perasan, dia p ulas DURING the zaman.
So, bila dah salah setting, aku tegorla dia...its normal la lao mamai2 lam kelas mcm ne..
And the whole class laughed kot, no hard feeling pun n kitorg pun mmg da biasa gelak2 mcm ne...xstress, happy.
Tiba2 dia...blurted out..."korang buat apa ne? Asal kamu potong dia cakap?"
"Oh...sebab dia x perasan kot...perkataan SEBELUM tue..saya ingatkan aje..."
Tiba2 satu kelas kena bebel...isu...xrespek orang punya idea..nais..

2nd case, was maybe bcuz of boredom, maybe jugak salah kitorg, maybe niat sebenar baik nak elak ngantuk, ada member of the class yg main bingo n pass notes during the class.
And lecturer yg eagle-eyed ne spotted 'em, terus panggil depan kelas, kena bebel...
"Awak tahu hukum karma, awak buat saya mcm ne, awak akan dapat double triple super ble2 dri student awak. Awak tunggu je lah harinya"-ayat ne aku alter sikit. hehe.

3rd case, a lecturer has the authority to advice, to scold, but not to put down or humiliate people, esp in front of others.
Pardon me if I misunderstood your doing and intention.
Tapi apa yang aku nampak ialah teguran2 itu nmpak mcm ingin menjatuhkan.
And the words used punya tahap kelaseran yg agak tinggi sehingga boleh terhiris hati2 yg senipis kulit bawang ne.
"Awak xpaham arahan saya ke. Awak nak saya guna bahasa apa ya agak2 baru leh paham?"
So cynical.

4th...cukuplah... (:

Anyway, aku cakap kami di-stigma sebab masa our 1st interaction lagi dia dah awal2 cakap yg kami ne bermasalah.
"Saya xpenah ajar batch awak ne, tapi saya DENGAR cerita batch awak ne ada macam2 problem."
The problem is, u have just LISTENED.
Proved yet?
Belum kan? Tapi kau macam dah percaya.
We don't even start, you have already giving it up. :(

Well, xkenal maka xcinta.
Jemput kenal kami dulu, berilah peluang.

Mungkin kami pun xberapa kenal anda.
So, let us give each other chances. (: