Cancer, the story I see.

Cancer.
Where there is no real cure.
The treatment offered isnt able to cure but usually just to dampen the growth of the cancerous cell, lengthen the period of life, giving u a hopeful 1-2 months.
N even the chemo, the drugs given sometimes got too strong they even kills or alter the structure of the cells. Adala family aku was diagnosed ada ketumbuhan pada pangkal ketiak n dadanya.
It was luckily discovered fast (belom masuk stage yg dasat2) but then the aftereffect was devastating,
Rambut dia yang dulunya lurus now has becoming some weird curls on her. See the changes?

Entahla, aku penah terbaca artikel pasal GANJA/ CANNABIS (yg falls under dadah berbahaya) boleh direbus, n then diminum untuk bunuh sel kanser. Benda ne diamalkan oleh org Mongol n yg propose n perjuang benda ne ialah Bob Marley n kroni.
Aku xtau ini sekadar propa nak go against domestic drugs industry
or it really works.
Kalau ada alternatif, no harm trying kan? Tapi kalao ko baru simpan berapa gram pun ko da kena charge, how do we do?



Back to the aftereffect, lepas dia undergone treatment dia jadi agresif n suka marah2.
Maybe badan dia letih n rasa x selesa tue dia cepat marah.
Aku x tau ini ada kaitan dgn aftereffect ke x...one day dia kena attack stroke...
mulut dia senget for a week...n after that she recovered (not so) and her lips was back to normal
Good to see the physical changes..tapi kita even d doc pun xtau aktiviti apa je yg da jadi dalam otak dia..
From my experience dgn dia, aku observe dia jadi more aggressive, cepat sangsi...kalao ada orang call..even the call xde kaitan pun dgn dia..dia akan tanya aku sapa call..org tue nak apa...sapa kawan aku yg call tue.
and she always ask us repeated questions mcm ye ke? xkan la mcm tue? see how suspicious she wud be...
n when she is trying to find something,
like she remember placing her necklace atas meja tue,
but then bila cari2 xjumpa,
dia akan jadi sangat panik, body temp dia shoot up, nafas dia mengah2 mcm baru lepas berlari.
she cant stay calm.

there r cases when she claims she is seeing something . n time dia cakap tue masa kat bilik aku kat umah. hish. dah macam para2 sakura activity.
She cant sleep with lights closed
N if really possible, dia nak tidur berteman
n there r times kalao xde teman, dia akan nangis, or stay up whole night until la dia fall asleep bila da pagi.

but despite that, dia punya memori yg sangat kuat,
walaupun x dapat cakap dalam struktur ayat yg betul, tapi kitorg leh tangkap apa yg dia cuba nak cakap
n she can even show us directions to tmpat yg berpuluh tahun dia x pegi
n she can rmb in detail events bila dia pegi somewhere, dgn sapa,
n good she knows us, her family well. (:
so jangan fikir ko leh tipu dia or fool her around!

N yknow to take care of orang mcm ne mmg perlu kesabaran.
Aku ne boleh tahan kurang sabar.
My ayah lagilah tahapnya sabar agak tipis belum dicampur baran tahap super saiyanya. hehe.
My mom  la yg paling sabar layan kerenah n prepare what is good for her.
Thanks to Allah she had recovered A LOT

Now that she can even manage herself. (da x takut tido sndiri, basuh baju sndiri n so n so)
But sometimes, the degil aftereffect tetap ada. haha
Sometimes it is funny to find her arguing with my father.
Contohnya, kitorg jalan2 dekat mall, n when it comes to time balik,
ayah aku kata jom balik, jalan cepat skit...
she said ya, but she still berlenggang di belakang dgn selamba masih tgok2 barang sdngkan kami dah 500m di hadapan.
Bila bagi arahan, dia akan kata ya, tapi respon nya lama baru keluar.

Masa mudanya, she spent lots on cosmetic ranging from safi,  amway, even tried out sk2 and clinique yg mmg aku lalu n jeling je lah kat kiosk dia. haha. brand2 impian setiap wanita sejati kot tue.
Katanya, bcuz of using too much brands and this products la dia leh terkena ketumbuhan. She even drink n ate supplements which is believed to do good but then still we never know it will end up like this.
Lagi satu, maybe sebab keturunan pun ye jugak.
Our family has losed one becuz of this n we cannot afford to lose another. :(
Tapi kalau dah smpai masa...siapalah kita tuk berkata tak...

The thing is kena amik pengajaran la...
aku pun xtau la dgn gaya hidup xsihat aku...
makan bukan2...pakai bukan2...nti end up jadi bukan2...
skrg ne banyak sgt benda they post lam fb n blog
pearl tea cancerous la
sardin. maggi, mekdi sume penyebab kanser la
yg cancer2 ne juga la feberet aku
it is....
..

Bukan rasis, tapi inilah.

Recently, aku ada tolong orang jual cupcakes.
So, like it or hate it, aku p annoy tiap2 penghuni2 bilik2 tersebut.
Good and bad, aku dapat both responses.
What really counts, cakes sold out.
Peluh, mengah n air liur aku duk promo dari bilik ke bilik pays off.

Apa yang aku nak story is about the response yg aku dpt dari random chinese girls.
Dorg yg bukan classmate, bukan jiran, bukan sapa2, but satu kampus dgn aku.
Most of them bukak pintu, seems surprised n blurred.
Not lucky enough, ada yang straight away cakap "Tak apa2"
Aku bukak mulut pun xlagi. Korang buat aku mcm criminal yg tipu org lam scam gores dan menang tu pulak.
Bila aku explain "I am selling cupcakes. Interested?"
They were like "Uh?"
Aku pun tayang laa cupcakes tue.
And dorang pandang like dorang super jijik.
Wei makanan tue. Comel lagi. Problem?

Chinese in nature memang susah nak mesra unless bila ada chance korang nak kenal satu sama lain.
Kalo korg pndai akademik, sgt cun, leh belajar sama2.
But it is naturally, kao yg kena tanya dorang DULU.
If u no ask, they will no show you. ---> Benda ne my chinese friend sendiri yg bgtau direct kat aku, mang cara dorang. Seemed selfish. Tapi lao ko nak ilmu, ko lah p cari kan?
Kalao lagi pandai dari dorang, lagi peh3, dorang akan adore kao, so u got a plus point.

Tapi lao chinese yg biasanya xda kaitan...
Memang susah nak bermesra..silap2 dorg leh p tarik muka depan kao..
But not all, xleh generalize, ramai je gak yg ok2.. (:

However, my chinese fren penah story kat aku
Dorang somtimes do look down on melayu or other races.
Egocentrism la ne...(thinking they r better than others)
Ye la..balik2.straight As muka dorang...yg dominate business dorg lagi..
Mana x rasa superior kan?
And kao xpayah la nak speak english sgt dgn dorang
my frens said...if they dunno you
they wud rather speaks in malay to you
even how english you speak to them.
this is bcuz of
 two reasons:
1. dia x pandai omputeh
2. dia ingat kao x pandai omputeh
And ada juga yang kata..
Dorg chinese geli tengok malays n indians makan pakai tangan...
macam2...hahahaha

But let's be honest,
aku pun dulu masa kecik2
aku geli tengok kulit india yg hitam2 berkilat
walaupun aku pun sama hitam jugak...hahaha
aku rasa kotor n jijik
BUT
come to think of it,
sekarang ne, aku siap leh tampar2 kulit begitu, belai2
share air n makanan dengan mereka
tanpa ada rasa geli
dgn member2 indians aku
Its just stigma
Perasan yg ko buat2 sebab ko x kenal

In fact, personally aku rasa indians jauh lebih bersih
most indians yg aku jumpa n perati
dorang amat rajin bersihkan bilik
mop lantai hari2 beb..hari2...
kalao aku...seminggu sekali pun da kira seribu rahmat dah...kah3...
bilik mmg deko tahap warna warni la...ceria..
soothing je masuk bilik dorang..
tue la kao..xtau..nak geli2 pulak...
haish...
let's change n give each other chances (:

When they ask.

Some people...
when they ask..
they really seek for an ABSOLUTE, FINAL ANSWER
like..."Ko nak makan apa hari ni?"
don't u came up with "Entahlah.."
"Anything...I don't mind."
Sometimes they really need for a real suggestion
There are times when they can't decide
So, here comes your role

Some people..
when they ask..
they just want to hear an answer from your mouth
But actually they have already decided
of what to be done
and what will come next
like..."Ko nak makan apa hari ni?"
"What if we try some sushi?"
"Sushi last week kan da layan...Why don't we go for some western?"
Sometimes they just ask
So they will look diplomatic
But deep down inside
They are already sure what to be done


But still there are times when one really doesn't have the answer for the question
Like "Do we really love each other?"
The questions leave hanging.
Having the action speaks it answer.
Hurm.

Ni teori bodoh aku je. Jangan percaya sangat.